Dating apps have made it easy to find a mate (or at least a hook-up) in the time it takes to swipe right. (Results definitely not guaranteed!) Social media has made it oh-so tempting to look up the one who got away and float the ‘just thinking of you’ trial balloon.
But if technology has made finding people easier, it’s made forgetting about them when it doesn’t work out incredibly difficult. Often it takes more willpower than a stint on The Biggest Loser to keep from cyber-stalking an ex.
In a recent Modern Love column for the New York Times, The Entire Netflix Story of Us, Tonya Malinowski writes that the pain of her break-up was made worse because she could not stop herself from keeping track of what her ex was screening (the curse of a shared password.) In The Facebook Break-Up, Penelope Green writes that the tech behometh is creating a “Compassion Squad” to make romantic ruptures easier.
We’re certainly not there yet, as Jyst users regularly attest. One user wrote: “Can’t stop checking up on my and his new gf on fb. How do you break the cycle?” Another posted: “Help! Can’t stop checking my ex’s Facebook and it gets me upset each time. I know it’s a pathetic. It’s a problem I can’t break.”
For Malonowski, the pain overwhelmed the curiosity of what her ex was up to and she eventually changed her Netflix password. For the rest of us (admit it, you’ve cyber-stalked an ex at least once) it’s not always so easy.
The Jyst: The irony of romance in the tech age is that finding someone can be faster than ever and getting over them can take longer than ever. What’s worked for you???